50+ Funny Monday Quotes To Help You Get Through The Day
Quotes to Jumpstart Your Monday
Kick off your week on a high note with these rib-tickling quotes! From famous personalities to those unsung humorists, here are some gems to make your Monday more bearable.
Famous Funny Monday Quotes
- “Monday is like a math problem. Add the irritation, subtract the sleep, multiply the problems, divide the happiness.” – Unknown
- “God gave us Mondays to punish us for the things we did over the weekend.” – Unknown
- “I haven’t had this bad of a Monday since last Monday.” – Unknown
- “Just once, I would like to wake up, turn on the news, and hear… ‘Monday has been canceled, go back to sleep.'” – Unknown
- “Dear Monday, my momma don’t like you and she likes everyone.” – Justin Bieber
- “On Monday mornings, I am dedicated to the proposition that all men are created sleepy.” – Unknown
- “Monday is like the person who showed up at your house uninvited. And you’re trying to figure out why they’re there and what they want.” – Unknown
- “Monday must be a man, it comes too quickly.” – Unknown
- “Monday is like a picture. It needs a big frame of patience to make it a perfect photo for the week.” – Unknown
Quotes for When the Coffee Isn’t Strong Enough
Sometimes, even the strongest coffee fails to charge you up for a Monday. These humorous quotes about the inseparable bond of coffee and Mondays may just give you that extra push, tickling your funny bone while you’re at it.
Hilarious Quips about Coffee and Mondays
- “Monday morning coffee is just as important as Friday night liquor…almost.”
- “Too much Monday, not enough coffee.”
- “Why, oh why, does my coffee always finish before my Monday does?”
- “If Monday was a coffee, it’d be decaf.”
- “Even my coffee needs a coffee on Mondays.”
- “I’d like Monday more if it started later… or came with more coffee.”
- “I like my coffee like I like my Monday… past.”
- “Strong coffee and a Monday morning, two things that can wake the dead.”
- “Coffee: because even my calendar makes me lose sleep on Sundays.”
- “Coffee is my Monday superhero.”
- “My Monday checklist: Coffee, Coffee, Coffee… and yeah, Coffee.”
- “My morning coffee just filed a restraining order against Monday.”
- “Coffee: the best shield against Monday’s arrows.”
- “Compromise is the art of dividing a cake in such a way that everyone believes he got the biggest piece. Monday is the art of drowning those pieces in coffee.”
- “With enough coffee, even Monday looks good.”
- “Coffee: the most essential element in the periodic table of Monday mornings.”
- “Just once, I’d like a Monday with as much caffeine as my coffee.”
- “I measure my Monday mood with coffee spoons.”
- “A good morning starts with good coffee. A great Monday starts with a lot of good coffee.”
- “One venti-sized cup of coffee for Monday, please!”
Quotes to Spark Laughs at the Office
After exploring the cathartic power of humor during Mondays and the unholy bond between this challenging day and coffee, let’s jump into some amusing quotes that can spark giggles and lighten the mood at your workplace.
Funny Monday Quotes for Office Display
A fun way to encourage light-heartedness is to display funny quotes around the office. Here are some cheeky and laugh-inducing Monday quotes sure to add some fun to the workday:
- “On Monday, I’m feeling like a squished bug on a windscreen.”
- “My alarm clock is clearly jealous of my amazing relationship with my bed.”
- “Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.”
- “Mondays are the potholes in the road of life.”
- “If each day is a gift, where can I return Monday?”
Cheeky Monday Quotes to Lighten the Office Mood
- “Dear Monday, I think you should take a holiday. Trust me, no one will miss you.”
- “Monday. The moment when Sunday stops feeling like Sunday and the anxiety of Monday kicks in.”
- “Warning: Going to sleep on Sunday will cause Monday.”
- “It’s Monday. Time to take over the world.”
- “Monday is the evil way the calendar says, ‘Welcome back to your life.'”
- “Mondays: Proving once again, some things just can’t be fixed with duct tape.”
- “You can’t make everybody happy. You aren’t a jar of Nutella.”
Funny Monday Quotes from Celebrities
Celebrities, they’re just like us – grappling with the Monday blues. Here’s a helping hand from the rich and famous, armed with funny and witty takes on Mondays that are sure to bring a grin to your face.
Comedians’ Takes on Mondays
- “If Monday had a face, I’d punch it.” – Kevin Hart
- “Mondays are mundane, like Tuesday minus 24 hours.” – Jerry Seinfeld
- “Monday. The day I wake up knowing my weekend to-do list has been shifted to the next weekend.” – Ellen DeGeneres
- “Most people dread Mondays. Me? I don’t have to work on Mondays. I dread meeting people who hate Mondays.” – Dave Chappelle
- “Mondays are just the start of the work week, not the apocalypse. Try telling that to my alarm clock.” – Amy Poehler
- “Think of Monday as a plate of jalapeno poppers. Some find it too hot to handle, others embrace the burn.” – George Carlin
- “Mondays always arrive so fast yet surprisingly never on a Friday.” – Bill Burr
- “The only good thing about Monday is it’s one day further from the next Monday.” – Sarah Silverman
- “Why does Monday rhyme with abominable, detestable, and miserable? Oh, it doesn’t? Feels like it should.” – Conan O’Brien
- “The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.” – Gabriel Iglesias
Motivational Monday Quotes from Celebrities
- “I don’t have happy hours on Mondays, I create them.” – Beyoncé
- “I fully charge my energy every Monday morning. It drains out by Monday noon.” – Tom Hanks
- “Monday: An unfortunate event scheduled between Sunday fun day and Taco Tuesday.” – Jennifer Aniston
- “Why doesn’t Monday come with a pause button?” – Leonardo DiCaprio
- “The secret to Mondays? Pretend it’s Friday and just look confused all day.” – Shaquille O’Neal
- “If Monday was a person, it would be the one who’s always asking for a favor but never returns one.” – Dolly Parton
- “I treat Monday like a balloon. I let it go.” – Kanye West
- “Mondays are like Hollywood – they just keep rebooting.” – Meryl Streep
- “My recipe for a great Monday? Leave out the alarm clock and stir in more weekend.” – Brad Pitt
- “Monday is when I check my fan-mail. Mostly, it’s my fans pleading for it to be Friday again.” – Kim Kardashian
Music-inspired Funny Monday Quotes
Everyone knows that music and humor can both be great mood-boosters. Luckily, several musicians and songwriters have combined these two elements to create music-inspired Monday quotes that can help start your week on a high note.
Musicians’ Humorous Lyrics about Mondays
- “Oh, come on, Monday, don’t be such Fri-nally.” – Anonymous Songwriter
- “On a Monday, I am waiting. Tuesday, I am fading. And by Wednesday, I can’t sleep.” – Avril Lavigne, ‘I’m With You’
- “It’s just another manic Monday, wish it was Sunday. ‘Cause that’s my fun day, my I don’t have to run day.” – The Bangles, ‘Manic Monday’
- “Rainy days and Mondays always get me down.” — The Carpenters, ‘Rainy Days And Mondays’
- “Monday morning you look so fine, Friday I got travelin’ on my mind.” – Fleetwood Mac, ‘Monday Morning’
- “Monday morning, it was all I hoped it would be.” – The Mamas & The Papas, ‘Monday, Monday’
- “Blue Monday, how I hate Blue Monday.” – Fats Domino, ‘Blue Monday’
- “Goodbye Ruby Tuesday, who could hang a name on you? When you change with every new day, still I’m gonna miss you.” – The Rolling Stones, ‘Ruby Tuesday’
Catchy Monday Lyrics That Make Us Smile
- “Just another Magic Monday.” – Bob Seger song adjustment
- “I don’t like Mondays, I wanna shoot. The whole day down.” – The Boomtown Rats, ‘I Don’t Like Mondays’
- “Monday, Monday, can’t trust that day.” – The Mamas & The Papas, ‘Monday, Monday’
- “Monday morning, you sure look fine.” – Fleetwood Mac, ‘Monday Morning’
- “Hello Monday, let’s walk hand in hand.” – Ani DiFranco song adjustment
- “It’s just another manic Monday. I wish it were Sunday.” – The Bangles, ‘Manic Monday’
- “It might be a Monday, but everything’s A-OK.” – Spin Doctors song adjustment
Quotes from Famous Movies and Shows
Let’s jump into some chucklesome quotes from your favorite films and TV shows. These lines perfectly capture the love-hate relationship we all have with Monday.
Classic Cinema’s Comic Monday Quotes
- “Looks like someone has a case of the Mondays!” – Office Space
- “Just another manic Monday!” – Breakfast Club
- “Mondays should be optional.” – Groundhog Day
- “I’m just trying to survive until Tuesday.” – Thelma & Louise
- “Monday, bloody Monday…” – A Hard Day’s Night
- “It may be Monday, but it’s only a day away from Tuesday.” – Gone with the Wind
- “Some days, you just can’t get rid of a Monday.” – Batman
- “Monday is the root of all evil!” – Airplane
- “You’re only given a little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it.” – Aladdin
Comedic Quotes from Famous TV Shows
- “Urgh, Monday – nothing a bit of shopping can’t fix!” – Sex and the City
- “Nothing messes up your Friday like realizing it’s only Monday.” – The Big Bang Theory
- “I don’t hate Mondays, I just prefer to not see them.” – Friends
- “Is it Monday already?” – How I Met Your Mother
- “I’d rather have a Monday done and dusted, than a Friday that’s just started.” – Breaking Bad
- “Mondays respect no one; even those in Westeros have to deal with it!” – Game of Thrones
- “Monday, why are you here?” – The Office
- “Long story short, Monday happened.” – Scrubs
- “It’s Monday. I got nothing.” – Seinfeld
- “Mondays are like a fat kid in dodgeball. Hard to avoid and always a hit in the face when you least expect.” – The Simpsons
Comics and Cartoons Inspirational Monday Quotes
You’ve appreciated the funny takes from personalities, celebrities, and even lines from movies and lyrics from songs. Now it’s time to jump into the world of comics and cartoons. Childhood memories, simplicity, and wit come together in these works to bring some much-needed laughter to your Mondays. From your favorite whimsical characters to the beloved “funnies” from the newspaper, these quotes are bound to lift your spirits right at the start of the week.
Animated Classics Funny Monday Quotes
- “‘Monday is a fresh start. It’s never too late to dig in and begin a new journey of success.'” – Mickey Mouse, Disney
- “Eeyore: ‘Mondays always get me down.'” – Winnie the Pooh, Disney
- “‘Mondays: Proceed with caution.'” – Shrek, DreamWorks
- “‘I’m ready, I’m ready, I’m ready…for the weekend!'” – Spongebob Squarepants, Nickelodeon
- “‘Life is full of questions. Isn’t it, Charlie Brown? The problem is that Mondays always bring them out.'” – Lucy Van Pelt, Peanuts
- “‘Why can’t we start the week with Thursday and end with Friday?'” – Dolly Forth, Sally Forth
- “‘Mondays are a lot like getting fat. They make you feel sad, then mad, then both.'” – Cathy, Cathy Guisewite
- “‘Start the week with a sense of irreverence, adventure, and caffeine… especially the caffeine.'” – Jeremy Duncan, Zits
Light-hearted Ways to Cope with Monday Stress
Having a chuckle can be the easiest way to get by the dreadful start of the workweek. Here are some funny affirmations and comical reliefs to stave off those Monday blues and start your week with a smile.
Funny Monday Affirmations
Positive thinking becomes even more potent when combined with humor. Here are some of the funniest Monday affirmations:
- “May your coffee be strong, and your Monday be short.”
- “On Mondays, I channel my inner superhuman to get out of bed.”
- “May your Monday be as swift as my internet connection.”
- “I am stronger than my strongest excuse – especially on Mondays.”
- “Mondays are doors to new opportunities – and more coffee.”
- “In a world full of Mondays, be a Saturday.”
- “I can’t help but fall in love – with every cup of coffee on a Monday.”
- “Saying ‘good morning’ on Monday counts as my cardio for the day.”
- “My alarm clock has a sense of humor – it goes off on Mondays.”
- “I’m not a Monday person. I’m a person forced into Monday.”
- “Why is Monday so far away from Friday but Friday so close to Monday? – Unknown Comic Strip”
- “Garfield: Just when I think I’ve hit rock bottom, I realize it’s only Monday.”
- “A day without sunshine is like…Night. And a Monday without a snooze button is a tragedy.”
- “If I’m grumpy, feel free to blame it on Monday.”
- “Peanuts: It was a dark and stormy night…then Monday came.”
- “That moment when Sunday stops feeling like a Sunday, and the anxiety of Monday kicks in.”
- “Eeyore: Mondays are heavy, just like my tail.”
- “If Tuesday was a movie, it would be called ‘Monday Part 2’.”
- “Monday has been canceled. Go back to sleep.”
- “The only person who likes Monday is a person who had a relaxing weekend. And no one has a relaxing weekend.”
Embrace Mondays with Humor
So, you’ve taken a journey through the world of humor, exploring how laughter can turn your Monday blues into a more enjoyable experience. You’ve seen how funny quotes can lighten your mood and build connections, transforming the start of your week from a challenge into an opportunity for laughter.
You’ve chuckled at the top 10 funny Monday quotes and found solace in the essential relationship between coffee and Mondays. You’ve discovered how humor can add fun to your workday and how even celebrities grapple with the start of the workweek.
You’ve appreciated the power of music-inspired humor and laughed at the love-hate relationship many have with Mondays through quotes from movies and TV shows. You’ve revisited childhood memories with quotes from comics and cartoons and found light-hearted ways to cope with Monday stress through funny affirmations and comical reliefs.
As you step into your next Monday, remember to embrace it with humor. After all, laughter is the best way to kick off the week. And who knows? With the right funny quote, you might even start looking forward to Mondays!