50+ Funny Fitness Quotes to Keep You Motivated

Ever find yourself dragging your feet to the gym? Don’t worry, you’re not alone. Sometimes, all you need is a little humor to lighten the mood and put a spring in your step. That’s where our collection of 50+ funny fitness quotes comes in.

Hilarious Quotes about Starting a Fitness Journey

Everyone knows that getting started can be the hardest part of a fitness journey. But with a bit of humor, you can turn that daunting first step into a laugh-out-loud adventure. Check out these hilarious quotes designed to tickle your funny bone and kickstart your motivation.

Quotes on Taking the First Step

• “The first step to getting in shape is to decide you’re not going to take anymore steps.” – P.J. O’Rourke
• “I don’t need a personal trainer as much as I need someone to follow me around and slap the unhealthy foods out of my hand.” – Anonymous
• “My exercise routine consists of doing diddly squats!” – Unknown
• “I’ve got 99 problems and I’m going to ignore all of them for another year and start a new fitness regime instead.” – Anonymous
• “I consider my refusal to go to the gym today as resistance training.” – Unknown
• “I’m trying to get into this whole ‘exercise’ thing, but the problem is every time I do it, I get this craving to stop.” – Anonymous
• “If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor.” – Joan Rivers
• “Walking to the fridge counts as exercise, right?” – Unknown
• “For me, running is both exercise and a metaphor. And… I’m really terrible at both.” – Unknown

Funny Quotes about Athlete’s Resolve

Keeping up with a consistent fitness routine requires resolve. Athletes, with their determination, provide us a treasure trove of humor to keep your spirits high! Here are some gems that reflect their unstoppable spirit in a light-hearted way.

Witty Reflections on Consistency and Dedication

• “I believe every human has a finite number of heartbeats. I don’t intend to waste any of mine running around doing exercises.” – Neil Armstrong
• “I consider exercise vulgar. It makes people smell.” – Alec Yuill Thornton
• “The trouble with jogging is that the ice falls out of your glass.” – Martin Mull
• “Whenever I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes.” – Robert M. Hutchins
• “Fitness – If it came in a bottle, everybody would have a great body.” – Cher
• “I’m in shape. Round is a shape.” – George Carlin
• “I really don’t think I need buns of steel. I’d be happy with buns of cinnamon.” – Ellen DeGeneres
• “The word ‘aerobics’ came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we’re going to charge $10 an hour, we can’t call it ‘Jumping up and down’.” – Rita Rudner
• “The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.” – Erma Bombeck
• “My idea of exercise is a good brisk sit.” – Phyllis Diller
• “My gym teacher told me to touch my toes. I told her I don’t have that kind of relationship with my feet.” – Author Unknown
• “I’m not into working out. My philosophy: No pain, no pain.” – Carol Leifer

Laughable Quotes on Eating Healthy

Shifting the spotlight onto the dietary aspect of fitness, we’ve rounded up some hysterically funny yet relatable quotes about healthy eating.

Satirical Observations on Dieting

• “I keep trying to lose weight… but it keeps finding me!” –Unknown
• “My heart says chocolate and wine, but my jeans say, for the love of god woman, eat a salad.” –Unknown
• “I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it.” –Anonymous
• “Dieting is wishful shrinking.” –Anonymous
• “I hate when I think I’m buying organic vegetables but when I get home, they’re just regular donuts.” –Unknown
• “I followed my heart and it led me into the fridge.” –Unknown
• “I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.” –A. Whitney Brown
• “I’m on that new diet where you eat everything and hope for a miracle.” –Unknown
• “Why do they call it ‘beauty sleep’ when you wake up looking like a troll?” –Unknown
• “If you eat in the kitchen, it doesn’t count as meal prep.” –Unknown
• “You can’t lose weight by talking about it. You have to keep your mouth shut.” –Unknown
• “The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe. Eat cake.” –Anonymous
• “Running to the kitchen is my kind of cardio.” –Unknown

Comedy Gold from Fitness Industry Celebrities

Well-known personalities from the fitness industry and celebrities have something to say! Let’s sweat out the seriousness and pull in some laughs with their amusing and funny takes on fitness and health.

Hilarious Fitness Quotes from Famous Personal Trainers

• “The only bad workout is the one you didn’t do.” – Jillian Michaels.
• “Exercise? I thought you said extra fries!” – Richard Simmons.
• “You have to exercise, or at some point you’ll just break down.” – Barack Obama.
• “I really regret that workout – said no one. ever.” – Harley Pasternak.
• “Nothing tastes as good as being fit feels.” – Tony Horton.
• “Sweat is just fat crying.” – Bob Harper.
• “I consider exercise vanity thrown to the wind.” – Jackie Warner.

Funny Fitness Quotes from Celebrities

• “Running is a mental sport…and we’re all insane!” – Ellen DeGeneres.
• “I’m still thinking about pizza even when I’m eating pizza.” – Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson.
• “I like to mix up my workout routine. I run, and then I run faster.” – Kevin Hart.
• “I’ve got 99 problems and carbs are definitely one.” – Beyoncé.
• “The only running I do is after the ice cream truck.” – Jennifer Lawrence.
• “Every pizza is a personal pizza if you believe in yourself.” – Aziz Ansari.
• “Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying there in the hospitals dying of nothing.” – Redd Foxx.

Witty Quotes on Gym Culture

Diving into the world of weight racks and treadmills, let’s explore the humorous side of gym culture. These funny fitness quotes shed a light-hearted perspective on everything from gym etiquette to the diverse crowd that populates the fitness centers.

Humorous Takes on Gym Etiquette

• “If you consider your workout a chance to show off your new outfit, you’re not working out enough.” – Unknown
• “When in the gym, remember, you’re in a no flex zone. The mirror is for form, not for flexing.” – Unknown
• “If you leave a treadmill running while you go get a drink, you’ve missed the point of the treadmill.” – Unknown
• “I only go to the gym on days that end in ‘y'” – Unknown
• “Imagine paying for a gym membership to walk on the treadmill. Ever heard of the outside?” – Unknown
• “People who wear gym clothes everywhere: What is it you do?”
• “Ever noticed that everyone at the gym is either really in shape or really not? Where’s the in-between?” – Unknown
• “The gym is like a zoo. But instead of cages, we have machines. And instead of animals, we have sweaty humans.” – Unknown
• “The heavy grunter at the gym. Alerting everyone that, yes, he is indeed lifting weights.” – Unknown
• “Shoutout to the guy at the gym who looks like he’s on his first day. We’ve all been there, buddy.” – Unknown

Motivating Yet Amusing Quotes about Muscles

Welcome to the world where gym-goers flex not just their muscles, but also their sense of humor. Let’s jump into these funny, muscle-growing quotes that provide a delightful twist to your fitness journey.

Laugh-Out-Loud Quotes about Workout Pain

• “My abs are buried under layers of security.” – Unknown
• “I don’t stop when I’m tired. I stop when I’m done… or when I drop the weights on my foot.” – Anonymous
• “That moment when your workout hasn’t even started, and you’re already thinking about the nap afterwards.” – NobodySpecific
• “The only reason I ever do crunches is to spill crumbs out of my bra.” – OverheardAtGym
• “I don’t jog. If I die I want to be sick af.” – Abraham Lincoln (not really)
• “You got to burn to shine. But, don’t set the gym on fire.” – Anonymous

Laughing Through the Struggles of Working Out

• “When I flex, my muscles are like ‘Surprise!'” – FitterThanYesterday
• “If I got a dollar for every time I thought about going to the gym, I would be so fit. Financially.” – ChubbyNinja
• “My six-pack is protected by a layer of fat and a great sense of humor.” – JesterFit
• “The only six-pack I’ll ever have in my life is beer.” – ComicallyFit
• “I have got 99 problems but I am going to the gym and ignoring all of them.” – DenialAthlete
• “Doing burpees feels like doing a trust fall with yourself. And epically failing.” – GymClown
• “Sore today, sorry tomorrow.” – EveryTrainerEver
• “My get up and go? It got up and went.” – ProcrastiGym
• “Today’s workout is brought to you by the letter ‘D’ for ‘Donuts give me strength.'” – FitnessFunnies

Lighthearted Quotes on Fitness Goals

Moving forward in our journey of funny fitness motivation, let’s investigate into the area of fitness goals. These quotes bring to light the undoubtedly humorous side of setting health and fitness targets and aspirations.

Funny Reflections on Fitness Resolutions

• “This year my fitness goal is to develop a filter between my brain and mouth when I’m eating.”
• “My resolution was to lose weight. So far, the only thing I’ve lost is my motivation.”
• “Every year my resolution is to get a six-pack. Every year I end up with a full keg.”
• “Resolutions are more fun to make than they are to keep. That’s why I resolved to have more fun!”
• “I don’t make resolutions anymore. I just give myself permission to eat more chocolate.”
• “My biggest goal for the new year? To be able to touch my toes without bending my knees.”
• “I keep hearing ‘the body is a temple.’ I’ve decided mine is a secret chocolate storage facility.”
• “This year, I’ve resolved to conquer my fear of treadmills. Wish me luck!”
• “My fitness goal? To be the person my dog thinks I am.”

Amusing Quotes on Exercise and Dieting

• “I’ve finally cracked the code on weight loss. It’s all about losing the weight…in your head.”
• “Fitness? More like fitness whole pizza in my mouth.”
• “I’d do anything to lose weight…except diet and exercise.”
• “I told my wife I was going to start working out. She recommended I start with lifting my butt off the couch.”
• “Getting fit is all about mind over matter. I don’t mind, so it doesn’t matter.”
• “Exercise to be fit, not skinny. Eat to nourish your body. And always ignore the haters, doubters, and unhealthy examples that were once feeding you.”
• “You know you’re doing it right when you feel like dying after your workout.”
• “I’ve tried yoga, but I find stress more effective in burning calories.”
• “If running is so good for you, why do I always feel like I’m dying?”
• “I heard sweating helps you lose weight…so now I think about exercising a lot.”

Fitness Memes and Jokes from the Internet

No fitness journey is complete without a hefty dose of humor for good measure. As we investigate into the world of fitness memes and internet jokes, we’ll uncover unique ways to keep the laughs rolling and the motivation high.

Funniest Fitness Memes Circulating Online

• “When you check your phone during cardio and realize you’ve only been running for 5 minutes.”
• “The feeling when you can’t find your favorite protein shake in the fridge.”
• “You know you’re a gym rat when your social status is based on the number of workout selfies you post.”
• “When someone asks you about your diet but all you’ve eaten is pizza for a week.”
• “The sinking feeling when your gym partner cancels your scheduled workout.”
• “What you look like watching a food commercial during a diet.”
• “The proud moment when you finish a whole pizza and consider it carbo-loading.”
• “The terrifying moment when you hear someone cough in your gym during flu season.”
• “That immediate regret when you promise to workout early the next morning.”
• “Trying to justify your weekend binge as ‘cheat days.'”

Witty Workout Jokes: A Hilarious Take on Fitness

• “Why don’t some people ever visit the gym? Because it’s not their cup of tea… it’s their cup of protein shake!”
• “How do you know if someone has been to the gym? Don’t worry, they’ll tell you.”
• “Why do many fitness fanatics have great grammar? Because they’re very good at doing ‘tenses.'”
• “Why don’t you exercise while playing music? Because it’s too much treble.”
• “Why did the music note start lifting weights? He was tired of being flat.”
• “Why did the scarecrow become a weight lifter? He was outstanding in his ‘field’!”
• “Why don’t skeletons fight each other at the gym? They don’t have the guts.”
• “Which exercise is a banker’s favorite? The ‘withdrawal.'”
• “What’s a light bulb’s favorite exercise? The ‘lumen-lift’!”
• “Why did the girl break up with her treadmill? She felt they were just running in the same place.”

Quirky Fitness Quotes from Movies and TV Shows

The world of cinema and television isn’t short on memorable lines, and when it comes to fitness, they’ve delivered some surprising gems. Let’s jump into these fitness-related quotes that bring humor straight from big and small screens.

Famous Television Quotes about Health

• “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” – Michael Scott, The Office
• “Oh, you hate your job? There’s a support group for that. It’s called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.” – Drew Carey, The Drew Carey Show
• “Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy.” – Elle Woods, Legally Blonde (TV Series)
• “I have to exercise in the morning before my brain figures out what I’m doing.” – Marlee Matlin, Switched at Birth
• “I find that the most important part of a healthy lifestyle is not what you do in the gym, it’s what you do the rest of the day.” – Bob Harper, The Biggest Loser
• “I’m not out there sweating for three hours every day just to find out what it feels like to sweat.” – Cher, Clueless
• “No pain, no gain!” – John, Rocky III
• “I feel like I’m being poisoned. I knew I had no business going to a health club.” – Louis, Ghostbusters
• “If you mess up my hair, I’ll kill you myself.” – Selene, Underworld

Funniest Fitness Advises and Tips

Staying motivated in your fitness journey requires a dash of humor sometimes. How about some funny fitness advice and tips that will put a smile on your face and some energy into your workout routine?

Humorous Tips for Staying Fit

Remember, humor is the best medicine, and these tips bring just the right dose of laughter to your exercise regimens:

• “If you feel like quitting, just remember, squirrels climb trees every day. We can’t have you losing to a squirrel.”
• “If running were easy, it’d be called your mother.”
• “A gym membership is the most expensive way to prove you’re poor at commitment.”
• “Donuts still count as a meal if you walk to the store to get them.”
• “Even a bad run is better than no run. Unless, of course, that run is from the law.”
• “The best way to predict your healthy future is to buy extra-small leggings.”
• “Yoga: because nobody ever said ‘I regret that workout’ and then proceeded to stress-eat a dozen cookies.”
• “The heavier the weights, the closer we are to the floor. It’s safer that way.”
• “Yes, the gym is a love-hate relationship. You love it when you’re not there and hate it when you are.”

Finding Humor in the Journey to Success

• “Believe neon-colored shoes can make you run faster.”
• “Remember, the race always hurts. Expect it to hurt. You don’t train so it doesn’t hurt. You train so you can tolerate it.”
• “Success isn’t given. It is found, in the fridge, amongst the vegetables, but never in the chips bag.”
• “Feed your abs, don’t hide them under layers of junk food.”
• “Becoming an athlete is easy. You just stand on a start line, then stop at the finish one. Everything that happens in between is what we call ‘fun’.”
• “Every time you sweat, it’s like crying tears of fat.”
• “Remember, the second wind is real. Often it’s brought on by seeing someone less fit ahead of you.”
• “Strive for progress, not perfection. But if perfection comes accidentally, don’t shy away from it.”
• “If you want to run fast, stop texting while running.”
• “Warming up is the good guy. Skipping him would be like letting the villain win the movie.”

How Laughter Can Keep You Motivated

So, you’ve had a good laugh while reading these 50+ funny fitness quotes. They’ve given you a fresh perspective on fitness, haven’t they? Whether it’s the initial struggle to get moving, the dedication required to remain consistent, or the dietary challenges we all face, humor can make it all a bit more bearable.

These quotes have shown you that even athletes and celebrities have a funny side when it comes to fitness. Remember, it’s okay to laugh at the quirks of gym culture or the pain of a tough workout. Laughter can make your fitness journey more enjoyable and relatable.

And let’s not forget the power of a good meme or a humorous line from your favorite TV show. They can lighten the mood and keep your motivation high. So next time you’re feeling a little low on motivation, remember these quotes. They’ll remind you that fitness can be fun, and laughter is indeed the best motivator.