50+ Funny Procrastination Quotes to Make You Laugh While You Wait

Ever found yourself stuck in the swirling vortex of procrastination? You’re not alone! We’ve all been there, putting off tasks while time slips away. But who says you can’t have a good laugh while you’re at it?

Get ready to chuckle, chortle, and maybe even snort with a collection of 50+ funny procrastination quotes. These witty words of wisdom (or lack thereof) might just make your wait a little more entertaining. So sit back, relax, and enjoy a good laugh – after all, you’ve got time, right?

Funny Procrastination Quotes from Famous Personalities

You might think that only us ‘regular’ folks have a knack for procrastination. Turns out, some of the world’s most renowned personalities have a thing or two to say about it. Let’s take a comedic journey through their hilarious takes on delays and dawdles.

Quotes from Comedians

• “I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.” – Douglas Adams
• “Procrastinate? No. I just wait until the last second to do my work because I’ll be older, hence wiser.” – Unknown Comedian
• “Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday.” – Don Marquis
• “Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.” – Mark Twain
• “If you wait to do everything until you’re sure it’s right, you’ll probably never do much of anything.” – Bill Withers

Quotes from Authors

• “I never put off till tomorrow what I can possibly do – the day after.” – Oscar Wilde
• “Procrastination is the thief of time.” – Edward Young
• “Procrastination is the bad habit of putting off until the day after tomorrow what should have been done the day before yesterday.” – Napoleon Hill
• “Tomorrow is often the busiest day of the week.” – Spanish Proverb

Quotes from Musicians

• “Time you enjoy wasting was not wasted.” – John Lennon
• “I’m not a procrastinator. I just prefer doing all my work in a deadline-induced panic.” – Unknown Musician
• “Deadlines just aren’t real to me until I’m staring one in the face.” – Rick Riordan
• “If it weren’t for the last minute, I wouldn’t get anything done.” – Rita Mae Brown
• “Procrastination isn’t the problem, it’s the solution. So procrastinate now, don’t put it off.” – Ellen DeGeneres

Inspiring Procrastination Quotes from Personal Development Trainers

As we continue our journey through the world of humorous takes on procrastination, let’s shift our focus towards the field of personal development. When you think that delaying tasks is blah, let these insightful quotes spark a chuckle and motivate you at the same time.

Quotes from Motivational Speakers

Motivational speakers have a knack for turning procrastination into a creative and inspiring joke. Let these quotes show you the lighter side of postponing:

• “The best way to get something done is to begin.” – Les Brown
• “You can’t build a reputation on what you’re going to do.” – Zig Ziglar
• “The only difference between success and failure is the ability to take action.” – Alexander Graham Bell
• “The trouble with a rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.” – Lily Tomlin
• “The secret to getting ahead is getting started.” – Mark Twain
• “Action will delineate and define you.” – Thomas Jefferson
• “Faith in oneself is the best and safest course.” – Michelangelo
• “Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.” – Will Rogers
• “Make each day your masterpiece.” – John Wooden

Procrastination Quotes from Television and Movie Characters

As we’ve seen, even famous composers and authors aren’t immune to procrastination. Let’s extend our journey into the world of pop culture. Here, we’ve gathered notable quips from beloved sitcoms and influential movies, each portraying procrastination in their unique, humorous way.

Quotes from Popular Sitcoms

Laugh it off with these worthy mentions from globally loved sitcoms, where procrastination becomes a joke unto itself:

• From Friends: “I’ll be there for you… when I get around to it.” – Ross Geller
• From The Office: “Procrastination? Isn’t that just another word for ‘break time’?” – Michael Scott
• From Parks and Recreation: “Why would anybody ever eat anything besides breakfast food?” – Ron Swanson, delaying work until he’s had his meal.
• From Seinfeld: “I choose not to run!” – George Costanza, procrastinating on fitness.
• From The Simpsons: “I’ll study… after this episode. And the next one. And the next.” – Bart Simpson

Quotes from Movie Characters

• From Back to the Future: “I’m a professional student, Doc.” – Marty McFly
• From Ferris Bueller’s Day Off: “A day off is just another day to do nothing.” – Ferris Bueller
• From Fight Club: “Waiting for the perfect job? Procrastinating ’til perfection.” – Tyler Durden
• From Forrest Gump: “My mama always said… ‘Life is like procrastinating on a box of chocolates.'” – Forrest Gump
• From The Big Lebowski: “I’ll get to it, man. After my nap.” – The Dude

Witty Procrastination Quotes from Philosophers

Let’s investigate into the scholarly world of philosophy. While tossing around high-brow thoughts about existence, morals, and the human condition, philosophers − both ancient and modern − have contributed their share to the area of procrastination humor.

Quotes from Ancient Philosophers

• “We are what we repeatedly do. Procrastination, then, is not an act, but a habit.” – Aristotle
• “The greatest amount of wasted time is the time not getting started.” – Plato
• “The time to live is now, the time to procrastinate is…later.” – Epicurus
• “One who procrastinates in his choosing will inevitably have his choice made for him by circumstance.” – Lao Tzu
• “There is nothing permanent except putting things off.” – Pythagoras
• “The man who moves a mountain begins by carrying away small stones; the man who procrastinates ends up under them.” – Confucius
• “There are two types of people in this world: those who get things done, and those who procrastinate. Both will be late for dinner.” – Socrates

Quotes from Modern Philosophers

• “Procrastination is like a credit card: it’s a lot of fun until you get the bill.” – Christopher Parker
• “The scholar’s greatest weakness: calling procrastination research.” – Stephen King
• “I never put off till tomorrow what I can do the day after.” – Oscar Wilde
• “Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday and avoiding today.” – Wayne Dyer
• “You can’t just turn on creativity like a faucet. You have to be in the right mood. What mood is that? Last-minute panic.” – Bill Watterson

Procrastination Quotes from Cartoon Characters

Everyone loves a good cartoon. They lighten up our moods and give us cherished characters. Many of these characters are notorious procrastinators, delivering iconic quotes that perfectly encapsulate the spirit of putting things off for another day.

Quotes from Animated Movies

• “Finding a good spot for lunch is a full day’s work.” – Baloo in The Jungle Book
• “Today is a good day to do everything you said you were going to do tomorrow.” – Squirtle in Pokemon: The First Movie
• “I’m working on my five-year plan. I just need to decide when to start.” – Hammy in Over the Hedge
• “We’ll see tomorrow. Or the day after tomorrow, maybe.” – Manny in Ice Age
• “Oh I’ll get to it eventually, or not.” – Eeyore in Winnie-the-Pooh
• “After lunch I like resetting to zero by having a thorough nap.” – Puss in Boots in Shrek 2
• “Let’s do it tomorrow. Today is almost over.” – Oliver in Oliver and Company
• “Why do today what you can put off till tomorrow?” – Sid in Ice Age

Quotes from Animated Series

• “Tomorrow is the wonderful day when anything can happen, including nothing.” – Linus in Charlie Brown
• “I’ll do it, but only on the day when the Jellyfish stop stinging.” – Patrick in Spongebob Squarepants
• “Of course I cleaned my room – in my dreams.” – Bart Simpson in The Simpsons
• “I think, hence I’ll think about it tomorrow.” – Garfield in Garfield and Friends
• “You said today is tomorrow yesterday. So, when is tomorrow?” – Stimpy in Ren and Stimpy
• “I do hard work the easiest way possible.” – Winnie the Pooh in Winnie the Pooh
• “Procrastinate now, don’t put off relaxing till tomorrow.” – Tigger in Winnie the Pooh
• “I’ll start thinking about that puzzle, but not right now.“ – Velma in Scooby-Doo
• “I can’t work under these conditions; it’s too soon since my last nap.” – Garfield in Garfield and Friends
• “Why bother doing anything today that I can put off till tomorrow?” – Squidward Tentacles in Spongebob Squarepants

Mind-Boggling Procrastination Quotes from Scientists and Academics

Whoever said scientists and academics are all about harsh facts and jargon? These individuals, known for their immense knowledge and logical thinking, also have humorous takes on procrastination that will leave you in stitches. Between their theories and theorems, breakthroughs and publications, they’ve cracked the procrastination code and crafted these funny quotes.

Quotes from Renowned Scientists

• “Life is full of doors that don’t open when you knock, equally spaced amid those that open when you don’t want them to.” – Buckminster Fuller
• “Give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the axe.” – Isaac Newton
• “Someday is not a day of the week.” – Jane Goodall
• “I have been impressed with the urgency of doing. Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Being willing is not enough; we must do.” – Leonardo Da Vinci
• “Procrastination is my sin. It brings me naught but sorrow. I know that I should stop it. In fact, I will–tomorrow” – Gloria Pitzer
• “Opportunity is missed by most people because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work.” – Thomas Edison
• “The time to repair the roof is when the sun is shining.” – John F. Kennedy

Quotes from Famous Academics

• “Conditions are never just right. People who delay action until all factors are favorable do nothing.” – William Feather
• “To be always intending to make a new and better life but never to find time to set about it is as to put off eating and drinking and sleeping from one day to the next until you’re dead.” – Og Mandino
• “You may delay, but time will not.” – Benjamin Franklin
• “The only difference between a rich person and poor person is how they use their time.” – Robert Kiyosaki
• “If you put off everything till you’re sure of it, you’ll never get anything done.” – Norman Vincent Peale
• “Procrastination is the death of opportunity. Even catching a fish would not happen if waiting is the plan.” – David S. Viscott
• “You can’t just turn creativity on like a faucet. You have to be in the right mood. What mood is that? Last-minute panic.” – Bill Watterson
• “The perfect time to start something never arrives.” – Jeff Goins

The Lighter Side of Procrastination

So, you’ve journeyed with us through a world of procrastination humor. You’ve chuckled at famous personalities’ witty takes and found motivation in the words of personal development experts. You’ve reminisced on the hilarity of procrastination in pop culture and delved into the wisdom of philosophers. You’ve even giggled at animated characters’ postponement antics and admired the wit of scientists and academics.

Hopefully, these quotes have not only tickled your funny bone but also shed light on the universal nature of procrastination. It’s a shared experience that transcends fields, cultures, and eras, and it’s something we can all laugh about. Remember, next time you’re putting off a task, there’s probably a quote for that. So why not have a laugh while you’re at it? After all, they say laughter is the best medicine, and who knows, it might even get you moving!

Here’s to finding humor in the wait and embracing the lighter side of procrastination. Happy laughing, and less delaying!