4 Dark Night of the Soul Stages Explained (+21 Symptoms)

In our lifetime, we’ll form several different soul connections with other people. One of these soul connections is the relationship we have with our twin flame. Our twin flame is the other half of our soul, and meeting them in the same lifetime is quite rare. 

Once you encounter your twin flame, however, you’ll go through several twin flame stages. One of these stages is the dark night of the soul stage, which is one of the most common signs of soul-spiritual awakening. You’ll feel much despair, helplessness, and heartbreak during this period, and the only way to overcome it is through conscious and spiritual work. 

The dark night of the soul stage is a period you must endure before you can reunite with your twin flame. To get past this hurdle, it’s of utmost importance to understand the nature of twin flame relationships and learn about its stages first and foremost.  

Twin Flame Stages

  • Searching for the Other Half of Your Soul

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After your incarnation to earth, you’ll feel a deep longing towards something (in this case, someone) that seems like a significant missing piece in your life. This period of yearning is the first stage.

During this time, you’ll be inclined to make substantial changes in your life. It’s your subconscious telling you that you’re about to meet the other half of your soul. This period of preparation is something that you might do unconsciously. 

  • Meeting Your Twin Flame

When you’re about to meet your twin flame, you might have a hunch that something life-changing is about to happen. Once you encounter your twin flame, whether in a casual manner or during a special occasion, your soul will unmistakably sense the unique bond you have with this person.

This first encounter with your twin flame doesn’t necessarily need to be physical. Some twin flames first meet each other in their dreams. Most twin flames can use telepathic communication, and they often experience their first telepathic communication in their dream state.

  • Awakening the Twin Flame Connection: The Dark Night of the Soul

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The test and crisis stage, most often referred to as the dark night of the soul, is one of the most crucial out of all the twin flame stages (together with the runner-chaser stage). After all, this phase builds the foundation of the twin flame connection. 

Our twin flame is, quite literally, the other half of our soul. It’s believed that at the beginning of our existence, our soul was separated into two energies that were later on placed on different bodies.

We’re fated to meet our other half, either in this lifetime or the next, to complete our life purpose. We only meet them when we’re ready to discover absolute truths and the laws of the Universe.

In our journey on earth, we’re meant not just to grow and age physically. Our souls are also expected to expand, mature, and evolve. This process is called spiritual awakening or spiritual ascension.

Before we can achieve a higher state of consciousness, we must first challenge our paradigms and beliefs. This process can be difficult or even painful. 

During spiritual awakening, there might be feelings of abandonment, isolation, and despair. These low-frequency vibrations are usually felt during the dark night of the soul stage. Hence, the dark night of the soul is one of the most telling signs that an individual is about to undergo spiritual ascension. 

In most cases, spiritual awakening is triggered by significant life changes, such as meeting your twin flame. Although the first encounter with a twin flame usually brings intense positive emotions, things will get quite dreadful later on. 

Twin flame connections are perhaps the most intense (and most painful) among all the soul connections. This is because they show us not just our strengths but also our weaknesses. Our twin flame is the mirror of our soul, showing characteristics, personality, and behavior polar opposite to our own. 

Our ego hinders us from reaching our highest good, and the purpose of our twin flame is to help us become the best version of ourselves. Most times, this journey becomes overwhelming, and hence, individuals experience the dark night of the soul stage. 

During this phase, you’ll feel anguish, self-pity, and despair. You might not be prepared to see the dark parts of your soul that your twin flame will help you realize. Some might even describe this experience as something akin to death due to deep sorrow and regret. 

You’ll be buried in feelings of grief and devastation to the point that you might give up on yourself and your twin flame. There will be feelings of anger, distress, confusion, and angst during this time. This period is by no means smooth, and you might need help from a spiritual advisor to guide you during this time. 

It’s of utmost importance to remember that the dark night of the soul is vital for your spiritual growth. During this time, you’ll learn how to set boundaries for yourself, shift perspectives, and seek the meaning of life. Moreover, you’ll be able to discover what areas of your life need improvement for you to achieve your highest good. 

  • Running from or Chasing Your Twin Flame: The Separation Stage

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Twin flame relationships are unique. What you’ll experience is highly likely different from what other people will undergo. Most people, however, suffer from the separation stage.

The twin flame running or chasing stage involves distancing yourself from your other half. There are several possible reasons as to why a twin flame might do this. One explanation is the fear of intimacy.

Throughout this period, roles might be reversed. The chaser might become the runner and vice versa. This stage ends when both parties realize the importance of their soul connection.

  • Reuniting with Your Twin Flame

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The last stage is the union of the twin flames. The first part of reuniting with your twin flame is surrendering and acknowledging that the two of you are destined to meet. You’ll then realize that every twin flame stage has a purpose, and everything happens for a reason.

During this stage, you’ll feel as if you finally became whole. Your bond is one of the purest forms of soul connections, and there will be a balance in your relationship. As each other’s soul mirrors, you’ll recognize what gaps need to be filled.

How to Overcome the Dark Night of the Soul

The dark night of the soul takes place when an individual experiences a spiritual or soul awakening. One can consider it as a rite of passage, a significant stage in an individual’s life that they must go through to achieve their highest good.

It’s vital to note that this awakening may or may not have anything to do with twin flame relationships. Regardless of the cause of the spiritual awakening, the ways on how to overcome it remain the same.

  • Look Within

woman alone view

Experiencing the dark night of the soul will often make you wish to be alone. You might want to utilize this time of solitude to take a breather and look within yourself.

Part of overcoming this painful phase in your life is redefining your life purpose and identity. It’s best to connect with your Inner Self to rediscover not just what’s best for you but also what it is that you truly desire.

Writing down your innermost thoughts might help you through this process. After all, writing your frustrations and every other negative emotion can also be an effective way of release.

  • Embrace the Darkness

man serious monochrome

Embracing the darkness implies acknowledging that this phase in life is natural and something you must go through to achieve spiritual growth. Only after coming into terms of your emotions and frustrations, you’ll be able to accept them.

There’s no need for you to rationalize and justify your feelings and negative experiences. In certain instances, letting yourself feel these emotions as they are is the only way to start the healing process.

It’s best to welcome all your emotions, both positive and negative. You might want to remember that vulnerability during dark times is also a form of strength. Resisting will only make things more intolerable for you.

  • Nourish Your Body and Soul

smoke women illustration

The human mind and body are connected. Nourishing your body also nurtures your soul and vice versa. Therefore, it’s of utmost importance to take good care of both your physical body and spirit.

Having enough sleep significantly helps overcome the dark night of the soul because sleeping helps the body rejuvenate. It also helps to eat a well-balanced diet.

Feeling spiritually depressed will tempt you to eat unhealthy comfort food. It’s best to avoid such foods because they will only make you feel worse.

Feeling spiritually depressed will tempt you to eat unhealthy comfort food, and you must avoid this. It isn’t enough to feed your body with nutritious food. It’s best if you also nourish your soul by doing the following:

  • Do breathing exercises.
  • Immerse yourself in nature.
  • Make exercising a habit.
  • Spend more time with your loved ones.
  • Do centering and grounding exercises.
  • Read a book that interests you.
  • Create art.
  • Keep a journal or a diary.
  • Do volunteer work.
  • Trust the Process

As previously mentioned, people experience the dark night of the soul differently. How long this stage will last also depends on the person. The best thing to do is to completely trust the process.

Although there are stages to the twin flame awakening (which includes the dark stage of the night), the process isn’t linear. However confusing and overwhelming it might be, you must remember that this is one step towards achieving spiritual growth.

21 Symptoms of the Dark Night of the Soul

The dark night of the soul is often described as spiritual depression. Meeting your twin flame will shake your core, and although they only want the best for you, it’s inevitable for you to feel an influx of negative emotions such as:

  1. Abandonment
  2. Agony
  3. Angst
  4. Anxiety
  5. Betrayal
  6. Deceit
  7. Despair
  8. Disappointment
  9. Disconnection
  10. Disillusionment
  11. Emptiness
  12. Failure
  13. Grief
  14. Helplessness
  15. Loss
  16. Rejection
  17. Shame
  18. Suffocation
  19. Torment
  20. Vulnerability
  21. Worthlessness

You might feel these things without knowing why, and this can be very dangerous. If you feel trapped as if there’s no way out, or if you’ve already tried to deal with these emotions to no avail, it’s advisable to seek immediate help from a spiritual advisor.

Finding a Spiritual Advisor

Aside from the ways on how to overcome the dark night of the soul indicated above, it also helps to find a spiritual advisor. Professional spiritual advisors on this website who specialize in different kinds of soul connection can help guide you through your twin flame awakening journey.

As mentioned previously, the twin flame stages are by no means a linear process. You might need an expert to help you understand the nature of the dark night of the soul for you to successfully get through it. You might also find it useful to seek counsel from someone who already experienced it.


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