Aries men have a reputation for being fickle, hard to read, and suddenly disappearing. They are also bold, charming, and adventurous. They are typically the macho type who enjoys the chase and who likes being challenged. A relationship with an Aries man tends to oscillate between extreme passion to cold disappearance.
The astrological landscape of Aries is ruled by Mars, the planet of war, aggression, and desire. Just like the god of war, Ares, which its name is often associated with, Aries males are competitive by nature. They generally enjoy playing games and winning them. They are also drawn to strong independent women with fortitude, big dreams, and active personality.
Being in love with an Aries man can be fun but tricky. He is self-assured, and he goes for what he wants with all tenacity and determination. However, they can be unpredictable and have a proclivity to send mixed signals, be responsive but never really invested in the relationship, and reachable but never really there when you need him.
Now I can tell you all the tricks, strategies, cheat codes, and everything you’re supposed to do to beat an Aries man at his own game and give him a taste of his own medicine. Play hard to get, ignore him, stroke his ego, show off your wits, cheat on him, make yourself mysterious, don’t be too much or less of this and that, etc. But would that really make you happy?
It’s important to note that winning is subjective. Winning for an Aries man could simply be getting in your pants and adding you to the roster of girls he screwed over. Winning for you could mean taking revenge, making him regret his choices, or getting him to settle down with you.
Here are some ways you could beat an Aries man at his own game in a more fulfilling manner.
How to Beat an Aries Man at His Own Game
1. Focus Monomaniacally On Your Own Growth
Stop expending time and energy trying to give someone a taste of his own medicine and redirect your attention towards your dreams and growth. If they want to play a game, let them be. Why bother acting out an inauthentic life just to beat someone at this own game when you can just truly live your life?
Love is one of the most blissful experiences you can ever have in this life. Perhaps it’s a simple moment of being kissed on certain parts of your body that you are insecure about or having a no-bullshit absolute honesty conversation with your best friend, or maybe just being alone and reading an enlightening book. Soak in the feeling and remember that you are perfectly capable of giving this experience to yourself.
In our quest for love and approval, it’s all too easy to fall into the trap of molding a facade designed to win someone’s favor or admiration. But a love founded on deception and manipulation is not sustainable and doesn’t bring true fulfillment. It’s an exhausting and anxiety-inducing full-time job.
Maybe it’s not even strategic and coldly calculated. Maybe you’re not even aware of it. But if you want to experience genuine happiness, you have to stop imposing a certain image of yourself that you want to plant on their mind.
You can read all the self-help books about how to create your brand, persuade and influence people, market yourself, seduce and make people love you, but are you truly happy with the person you’re becoming?
With all the stress you put yourself through trying to put on a show, did you get your own approval? Why bother curating the perfect reel life to get their attention when you’re not even happy with your real life? Who are you trying to convince? What’s the story you’re trying to tell? What value does it have for other people?
2. Master The Rules of The Game
If you’re in the mood of playing the game just for the fun of it, you have to understand what game the Aries man is trying to play. What makes him tick? What’s his endgame? Is he trying to get in your pants? Is he bored, lonely, and just wants an ego boost?
From there, you’ll know the magic words to use to throw him off his game. If you want to, you could sink his battleship in a heartbeat and make him play by your own rules. When you’ve mastered the game, you can bend it like a pro, and no one could use it against you.
Once you’ve walked through the true nature of these games, you can just laugh at the ridiculousness of it all. You could opt to hold space for them and watch them uphold the identity they’re trying to portray, or you could stand in your power and call them out on their bullshit.
3. Offer Complete Freedom
Aries men, much like Aries women, are ambitious and maybe on a quest for some grand goal when you meet them. It’s important to give him space to work on his dreams and, at the same time, be proactive in pursuing yours. Let go of trying to win, lose or keep score on your relationship and simply help each other be the best version of yourselves.
Relationships are a great outlet to be completely yourself, confess your raw human truth, and still be met with acceptance. Having a sacred space to be weird, quirky, angry, insecure, and vulnerable can help both of you to get to know different aspects of yourself.
Keep in mind that you are free to set boundaries, and you are under no responsibility to make anyone else happy but yourself. However, you can listen deeply, be present, and invite them in a space to be completely as they are.
4. Be Honest About What You Want
A lot of relationships fall out because both parties can’t be honest with what they truly want. Maybe they don’t even know what it is that they want. Be honest with yourself on your own agenda. Go inward and ask yourself what do you want from this other person and why do you want it?
Do you want him to see you in a certain way? When you realize you don’t need anything from him, love flows more freely. Having it reciprocated is just icing on the cake and is not necessary for you to be happy. But it doesn’t mean you can’t ask for what you want.
Be bold, clear, and direct with what you want. Not all people will be willing to accommodate your demands, but you have to be honest about it. It could open up a new level of intimacy between you, or it could end the relationship.
Either way, stop trying to manipulate his behavior by dropping hints or suddenly being cold when he doesn’t comply with something you didn’t ask for. Simply ask, and even if he says no, at least you’ll know that by being absolutely honest with what you want, you’re saying yes to yourself.
5. Be Self-sufficient
Remind yourself that you have an endless reservoir of love within you, and you can tap into it whenever you want. You don’t have to look outside of you to seek love and approval because you have the power to give it all to yourself. You have to trust yourself that even when things fall apart, you’re going to be okay.
When you are at home with yourself, you can avoid all the mental and emotional gymnastics that often comes along with relationships. When you know who you are, you’ll learn how to sift through the right people to play with and how to establish the rules of the game you want to play.
Aries men are generally attracted to fiercely independent women with a wild and quirky personality, so you might click after all. A relationship with an Aries man can be filled with insatiable lust and passion that seems impossible to quell. They have magnetic charisma, natural leadership skills, and an enticing charm.
Nevertheless, you need to learn to walk away when you know you’re both playing a different game. You can’t change a person. He is what he is, and you are what you are. Simply remove yourself from the situation and play the game that’s more aligned with your truest self.
Other Ways You Can Beat Aries Man at His Own Game
- Take an inventory of your top priorities and redirect your attention to these areas.
- Read player guidebooks and dark psychology books to hone your player radar and get to know their tactics.
- Keep your lust, loneliness, and desire on the passenger seat, and allow your critical mind to take the driver’s seat.
- Maintain self-respect and hold yourself to a higher standard.
- Don’t chase and beg for his attention. If you think his playing you, pull back and focus on the things that matter to you.
- Tell him you see right through his games.
- Once you recognize he’s playing you, show no emotions and simply cut him off.
- Pretend nothing happened and keep dating other guys.
- Have fun without him.
- Match his energy by treating him exactly the way he treats you.
- Don’t let him have any power over you.
- Be confident and position yourself as having a higher status than him.
- Unleash a different aspect of yourself but be careful not to fall back on this player.
- Call him out of his bullsh*t.
- Don’t play his game.
- If you’re aware that you’re getting played, stop engaging and cut off all communications.
Throughout our lives, we have learned certain strategies to win the favor, love, and admiration of the people around us. Instead of being a space for truth and growth, relationships have become a hunting game of trying to capture our prey by our wit, charm, and fake interest as if they’re an animal.
Now you can play this game all you want; however, the most fulfilling relationships don’t breed out of playacting, manipulation, and deception. This is an exhausting game that doesn’t give real contentment. Forget about plotting your revenge, forget about trying to make him regret his decisions, forget about trying to beat him at his own game.
To truly beat an Aries man at his own game, don’t play the game, don’t give him any power over you, and just be your best damn self.